Head of Engineering Lesson 2 - Don't walk into accidental isolation

The really difficult challenge I've had is moving from being close to Quality Engineers and all the relationships across the piece, to managing lead engineers and working with the exec team.

So I'm at the same desk, seeing the same people but my role now is to help and support the leaders make their decisions without interfering and then have conversations at the exec level  - that I can't always share - with people I am slowly building relationships and learning their characters. I did start to miss the connections I had with the wider team and felt I was drifting away. It was beginning to make me anxious and the imposter syndrome started to rise.

So I decided to work to understand my anxiety and read The Power of Anxiety by Dr Sian Williams. In short I learned that I'm "sensitive". Not in terms of being easily offended, but I'm sensitive to people and situations. I read people, I work to understand them, I think deeply about situations and ruminate. When those thoughts are negative, thats anxiety. Anxiety is the body's protection against danger, and my ruminating was telling it I was in danger. I was allowing the negativity in the new world to swallow me up as I felt I had no-one at work that I could have those open conversations anymore. 

However, what the book explained is that my sensitivity is a super power. If I take hold of it and use it positively, I actually see situations that others who might not and can actually influence. If you are anxious, do something towards what you are anxious about to break the negative ruminating.
So this week, I talked to my old boss (he's still there at the moment), unloaded my thoughts and got myself positive. I also set out to make sure everyone knew, the role may have changed but I haven't. So I made myself present, contributed, shared some fun social information to reclaim my identity and started to talk with confidence at every level with a smile. I worked to keep myself present with everyone. I feel good, capable and needed.

So when your role changes or you get promoted and your surroundings change, remember who you are. That person got you this role and earned the respect and love from the people around you. Be that person and if you start to ruminate about things going wrong or that you're not worthy, do something directly against those negative thoughts. Find someone to unload with, colleagues at any level you're close to and of course your family and friends. I hope this helps some of you who suffer with anxiety. I recommend the book above to help give you your power back.